Thursday, November 3, 2011

End of my Japanese Hospital Adventure 日本醫院冒險記最終回

(中文版在下面)
After spending almost once a week at the hospital due to "Tuberculosis suspicion" hypothesized by my clinic doctor, all tests turned out negative. DUH... I already told you doc, I didn't have tuberculosis. But no, my young "specialist" doctor insisted that I go to the hospital 4 times in a month till they find traces of this deadly bacteria. I didn't believe that I had TB, but after all his psyching to do further tests, he made me believe that I indeed could have contracted TB.

The first thing on my 4th(and final) appointment was to get an xray again. So I went to the radiology department but was surprised that the technician wanted to take a side view xray too. I told him that I was worried about the amount of radiation that I already received, but he reassured that the dosage from xray was so small that it's okay to take several times. WHAT? You mean I can even take 2 xrays per week for 1 month and be totally cool? Alright... since you insist and you're the professional, fine.

LUCKily, the shadow had somehow disappeared so it seemed to be a case of mild pneumonia. So I asked my "specialist" to analyze the side view xray for me. After all, what I think is useless for me may be useful for them. But guess what he replied? "Oh actually it's difficult to see things on the side view xray". Great doc, you made me take these side view xrays in the past to fill some xray quota right?

Sensing my frustration that he made me do so many tests and visits for nothing, he reassured me that it was definitely a safe and wise choice to do them. Moreover, it's possible that the antibiotics that were given to me earlier had CURED my TUBERCULOSIS!? WHAT? Tuberculosis can be cured easily with 2 weeks of antibiotics? Great, must be some kind of miracle medicine you have there, remember to apply patent and let me endorse it.

So...it took the hospital 1 full month to complete all tests and conclude that I had no TB. Meanwhile, I HAD RECOVERED ALL BY MYSELF without any drugs from them! After all, it was common cold and mild pneumonia, not TB.

Finally, as a final closure to this stupid suspicion case, my young "specialist" doctor asked if I'd fully recovered from my common cold. I told him that my nose is still stuffy and occasionally a bit of phlegm, but it's so minor and doesn't bother me that much. So like the usual cautious and paranoid "specialist" he was, he gave me this advice: "I recommend that you see the Otolaryngology department to have them examine your nose. Because if your condition persists, it's possible that your pneumonia will return and cause damage to your lungs"... ...

... ... ...(speechless)

I conclude that Japanese doctors here must had received some kind of marketing and sales training as requisite to their practice.

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因為被診所的醫生懷疑是肺癆,所以幾乎每週一次去大醫院接受檢察。結果如我所料,不是肺癆嘛!!!#*%$的年輕專科醫生還一直勸我接受一系列的測試,直到找出肺癆細菌為止!本來不信的,但是被他這樣催眠後漸漸相信真的有了!orz...

第4次復診,又要我去照X光。到了輻射部門,護士說側面也要。我說啊,被照了這麼多次了,很擔心輻射也...結果護士解釋說X光的輻射性很低,可以照很多次都沒問題。靠!也就是說一個月照6片都沒問題嗎?幹。竟然你是專科,沒話說,照吧。

幸好之前的奇怪影子消失了,也就是說不是肺癆而可能是肺炎!那側面X光有用嗎?結果醫生看了一下說...“其實側面X光很難看得出有任何東西“。靠!你是說之前要我照的幾次側面X光都是拿來擺設的嗎?

因為看得出我很無奈要我來醫院那麼多次幹嘛,所以醫生安撫我說這些檢測是絕對正確的!做徹底的檢察會比較安心。況且,之前給我的抗生素可能把肺癆細菌給克服了。靠靠靠!肺癆可以單靠2週的抗生素就被殺死了嗎?太神奇了。有這種神藥要記得申請專利,然後請我做代言人!

最妙的是...醫院竟然花了一個月的時間來檢測我是否得了肺癆。而且在復診的當兒,我全靠自己微弱的免疫力來慢慢康復的!

最後要結案時,醫生問了我一下感冒完全好了嗎?我說鼻子還是偶爾塞住的,有點痰,但是比之前好多了。然後醫生給了我最後的小忠告:“我建議妳最好去耳鼻喉專科去看看妳的鼻子。因為假如繼續下去,妳的肺炎有可能復發,傷到妳的肺就嚴重了。

我堅信日本的醫生在行醫以前,一定受過某銷售訓練的。

13 comments:

  1. 可能有業績壓力吧!?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Tina: 不信沒業績也難!他最後的那句勸告,真的是太明顯了。

    ReplyDelete
  3. 庸醫有沒有開轉診單給妳啊?
    你看什麼科啊!庸醫不能開感冒鼻塞的藥嗎?
    難怪日本藥妝店那麼多...

    ReplyDelete
  4. Well ain´t that dude paranoid!

    Good to know everything went fine...is like you knew and even I knew...but is like when I took the HIV test for some work overseas a couple of years ago...I knew I was ok, but styill the day when they were to hand me the exams I was a bit freaked, like "Maybe when I went ot the dentist....OR when I donated blood...OMG!!!!"

    So everything is cool

    ReplyDelete
  5. 看來日本的醫院很缺錢唷...

    ReplyDelete
  6. .......我知道这不是可以笑的时候,但还是禁不住笑起来了。姐姐,你还真幽默。
    无论是肺痨还是肺炎,希望你早日能把病毒消除,恢复健康哦。


    哎。最可怕的还是看一个ヤブ医者........

    ReplyDelete
  7. austin: 唉,有收據嘍。還好大學有每年60,000yen的醫藥補助。氣人的是,我在新加坡買的外國留學保險沒保這個,只保意外。靠!每年買了又不能領這個那個的,明年不投保了。

    canthushme: YEAH! Exactly right!? It's like oh... maybe...maybe I really do have it after all. I was so paranoid for the past one month. Thank god it's over! I'm definitely avoiding Japanese doctors if possible now...

    小卓: 對啊,動不動就要你照X光,看來日本的醫生應該很有錢。

    Isao: 清掉了啦!真佩服你們日本的醫生!動不動就往最壞的那一面想!把病人嚇死以後就建議一連串的檢察...比生意人好要會做生意呢!

    ReplyDelete
  8. >EVA姐
    oh,ooops! Sorry没看清楚哎。
    恭喜妳克服病魔!

    话说,我现在正准备回国,回到横滨!
    希望哪天有空出来见一面哦。

    ReplyDelete
  9. Hahaha~~ Don't U missed Spore GP?? Simple cold med will make it all go away + MC.
    Glad U recovered liao. ^_^/

    ReplyDelete
  10. hui: I miss my Singapore doctor! Effective affordable medicine! Though cannot claim the fee. Recovered liao, thanks! :P

    ReplyDelete
  11. >EVA姐
    我这次要逗留2-3年。。。。。。

    ReplyDelete
  12. Isao: 哇! 是回家For good嗎?

    ReplyDelete

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